In another leak exclusive to Free Movement it is possible to reveal further Immigration Rule changes to be introduced at short notice. It is understood the new Statement of Changes will be published on 25 December 2013, becoming the seventeenth Statement of that month and the 97th of this year.
In the wake of new rules preventing Bulgarian and Romanians from claiming benefits and building pre-emptively on the provisions of the new Immigration Bill, a new section to Appendix FM will ban several other activities that were already banned.
The paragraph numbering tests a new post-sequential methodology evolved from the current style of Appendix FM. A Home Office source informs me that this is because the drafting team have ‘literally run out of letters and numbers‘.
Section X-MAS provides as follows:
X-MAS.£$#. The definition of ‘foreigner’ in this paragraph shall include persons with the following characteristics:
(u) Actually being foreign;
(v) Sounding foreign;
(w) Looking foreign;
(wb) Having a foreign name.
X-MAS.3.%^. This paragraph applies if you are a foreigner as defined.
X-MAS.2.**&. This paragraph also applies if you are married to or the partner of a foreigner or the child of a foreigner
X-MAS.9)(‘. Christmas is cancelled.
X-MAS.0£^!. Also, foreigners must not:
(c) bait bears;
(b) fly without wings;
(a) create perpetual motion machines or otherwise offend against the Second Law of Thermodynamics;
(!) claim benefits that they can’t claim anyway.